“Not everything you question is meant to be fixed - some of it is meant to be released.”

Just another manic Monday… go ahead, sing it - you know you want to!!!

But honestly? Today feels really damn good.

Last week, and especially this past weekend, there was so much going on energetically that I found myself second guessing absolutely everything. And I mean everything. Friendships, offers, subscriptions, groups I’m part of … hell, I was even going through my client list and email list like “hold up, what are we doing here?” LOL

It wasn’t subtle either. It was one of those waves where everything feels up for review at the same time, and if you’re not grounded in yourself, it’s really easy to spiral and start tearing things apart just for the sake of trying to feel in control again.

Luckily, I knew it was coming.

So instead of reacting, I set myself little reminders. Sit back. Notice. What’s meant to stay will stay. What’s meant to fall away will show itself. Don’t rush it. Breathe. Set your goals. Do the damn thang … but not based on what anyone else expects. What do you actually feel?

And yeah… this girl put herself in a bit of a timeout.

I reorganized the office, cleaned things up, shifted stuff around, and in the middle of that, I set up the “spooks” my father-in-law made. They’re sitting in here now, and every time I look at them it hits a little different. I’m not gonna lie, I had a few “don’t cry, don’t cry” moments, but at the same time, it feels really good having something he was so proud of in a space where both me and my hubby spend so much time.

It made the space feel … grounded.

And that’s kind of what the whole weekend turned into.

Yes, I still got the regular work done, but more than anything, it felt like a reset. I even took actual downtime with my hubby - phone on Do Not Disturb, just sitting and watching TV like a normal human for once ... Those that know me know that’s not exactly my default setting.

But I think I needed that pause.

Because sure enough, everything I was feeling started to sort itself out.

The gut checks I was having? Confirmed.

And then came the real test.

The “are you going to shrink again, or are you actually going to stand in this?” moment.

I’m not going to pretend it was easy, because it wasn’t. I’m someone who naturally wants to give, support, show up, and help wherever I can. That’s just who I am. But when accusations started getting thrown around - and I’m talking complete BS - I had to make a choice.

Old me would’ve sat there and started questioning myself.

This time? I didn’t.

I knew where I stood. I knew what was true. And yeah, I had to sit with my response for a bit to make sure I wasn’t reacting out of pure fire, but once I was clear, I made the decision based on what was actually best for me.

And when I asked myself the real question - am I going to feel comfortable staying here, or am I going to second guess every message, every conversation, every time I open my mouth - the answer was obvious.

No.

So I chose myself.

And once that decision was made, it was like everything else followed. There were a few more groups that got the same level of honesty, and by the end of it, out of four, I stayed in one.

No drama. No big scene.

Just clarity.

Friendships were another piece that came up, and that one felt a little softer but just as important. There are still a couple I’m sitting with, giving them space to show me where things actually stand, but there were four this weekend that really cemented themselves. Nothing huge or over the top, just really clear moments that showed me exactly who they are and why they’re in my life.

And that matters.

Because I realized something through all of this.

I’m actually happiest with a smaller circle.

I don’t need to be surrounded by a ton of people, and I definitely don’t need to be the center of attention. What I do need is connection that feels real. I need to feel like I can show up, support, be there - whether that’s listening, hyping someone up, or helping them work through something.

I’m not built to just sit there and exist quietly in the background.

So with all of that clarity in place, I moved.

I set the dates and times for the Backwards to BadAss beta. I finalized edits on the workbooks. I went back into my website with a completely different level of focus - no rushed energy, just clear, steady movement.

Even got outside for a bit while hubby and kiddo ran errands. Sun was out (finally), snow is melting, and yes … I absolutely checked my apple and lilac trees for buds like a full-on proud plant mom.

And it just felt … right.

Like everything settled into place.

So yeah, if you’ve been sitting back watching and haven’t said anything yet about Backwards to BadAss, here’s your moment.

We start Thursday, April 23.

You’ve still got time to speak up, and if you wait until the full release in May, that’s totally fine too - but just know it won’t include the live coaching or the Q&A side of things.

This round?

We’re doing it together.

So if you’re in … say it.

Because come the 23rd, we’re moving forward either way.